Because Laughing is Easier

There are different sides to me as a person -- not separate personalities, if that is what you were thinking.
More like there are different angles to me, as a person.

One of these said angles is the pinterest-quote-poetry Elizabeth.
If you go through my camera roll right now, you will see so many screenshots of poems.
Like, what in the world do these poems do just hanging out on my camera roll?
They are taking up precious camera space, and to be honest, what good do they do?
I mean, they don't really mean much until you stop all thought processes and focus on their obvious meanings and their background meanings.

There was a good little time period where I didn't really go on pinterest at all.  Lately, I go on there whenever I am bored, want to find a recipe or some kind of encouragement; which is a lot.

I came across this poem this past week, and it resonated with me, because I think it is the song of my soul.
If you catch me on a rough day or in a bad mood, I am sure you won't agree; but looking from any angle, no one is always going to be a perfect example of 'happy.'

There are so many things that make life so simple and easy and I will always think about them more than all the bad things that happen to me.

I guess I haven't been through a lot of the sh*t that other people have been through; and most times, do I even know what others are going through, especially when they resolve to pulling away from people who actually care about them, thinking that this may heal them from whatever they are going through?

I guess I shouldn't be emotionally passionate about this; I guess I should shovel my 'judgments' under the rug, because in the end, I can't change someone's mind, someone's heart.

Maybe my passion comes from my own thoughts; thinking that maybe I actually knew who you were, when really, I was just believing your character to be something that I have assembled from all your good qualities, ignoring the ones that always made me question your truest feelings towards me.

Don't get me wrong, I am completely unaware of what you are going through.
When you shut people out, you shut out their chances of making you feel whole again.
When you shut people out, you shut out opportunities to experience something beautiful.
I know, I have been scared my whole life to let people in.  The fear of the failures has seemed to overwhelm the possibilities of all the good that maybe could be if I actually just took one step out of my comfort zone.

But I am getting off track.

I don't know what you are going through personally; and even if I do, I am not privy to the emotions you are constantly feeling throughout the day.

There are some of you who, even when you are in a room full of people, you feel completely alone.
I've been there, multiple times.

There are some of you who are mentally exhausted in such a way that a long night's rest cannot satiate.
I've been there, multiple times.

There are some of you who feel completely overwhelmed and all-consumed by the constant movement of life.
I am there often way too often.

There are some of you who are unsure of the next step to take; and if you are anything like me, you are over-analyzing every possible direction, next step to take.
Sometimes, it feels like my life is in a constant state of 'what if.'

So if you are in those seasons of life, know you aren't alone.
And you never have to walk through these seasons alone.

You don't always have to be in a positive mindset mode.
You are free to cry, to have mental breakdowns.
Don't hold anything in, love; let it all out.
But know, you cannot do this alone.

You don't always have to sustain a positive mindset, but you need a hand to hold who can lift you up when you feel low.
You are free to cry, to have those deeply emotional breakdowns, but you need a shoulder who can catch the tears.
Don't hold anything in, let it all out to a soul who deeply cares for you; don't shut me out.
Tell me every terrible thing you ever did; tell me all of your weaknesses, all of you fears and deepest darkest secrets; and let me love you anyways.

People make an art out of over-complicating life; emphasizing the stress and allowing the constant worries to capitalize in their life.

Lately, whenever something significantly impedes the normal flow of life or introduces a new type of chaos into the mixture of  our everyday life, my dad's words of wisdom come to the rescue.
It's just a thing.

There are those people who walk into already chaotic situations and make it their goal, whether it be consciously or subconsciously, to increase the chaos, thereby, increasing the stress related to said situation.
Then there are those who take the chaotic situation for face value and have determined that to add chaos to the situation won't help anyone or anything. May as well just do what you gotta do and be relatively calm about it, 'cause chaotic vibes do nothing but increase the stress around you and in you.

It's nothing but a thing.

Everyone experiences stress; your stress is not more stress-y than the next person's.
And maybe I am thinking too much into it, but sometimes it seems like it is easy for you to act like your stress overshadows the rest of the world's stress and internal chaos.

No, honey, that isn't the case.

Just because I smile 80% of the time and choose to laugh when I do something terribly dumb doesn't mean I am stress free, doesn't mean there aren't nights that I cry myself to sleep, doesn't mean that sometimes I wonder if life is actually good.

But, since I have chosen to adopt the mindset that life is truly beautiful and no matter what sh*t crosses my path, I will choose to be happy, I have spent more time smiling and laughing and less time crying and complaining.

Flowers don't grow without water.
And sometimes you have to choose that you are going to enjoy life, despite the weather, despite your season.

I do not have time to be sad every day and ungrateful; I have every reason in the world to be happy.